My dance card is pretty full...

I was pretty worked up last night with all the possibilities after talking to Jen. I had a vague idea of setting some groundwork to include hubby. It seems like a reasonable entry point and pretty non-threatening. I could either tell him the truth or parts thereof. Either he would be OK with a swap as it is, or if not, he sure isn;t going to object to another girl in our bed, is he?

I wasn't sure how to proceed so I started with a few verbal nibbles about Diana. I wondered aloud what she would be like if she were Bi. Hubby didn't have a lot to add to the speculation but had an agreeable grin throughout my musings. I wandered closer to the truth suggesting we look into where a plyable woman could be located that might be interested in a threesome. He was pretty mute on suggesting anything, though I know for a fact (obviously) he knows about Craigslist at the least. I suggested generically a personal ad or maybe a lesbian club. Both of us actually are truly ignorant of where such a club would be found. Decent size metropolitan area there has to be one.

It ended up being a pretty intense and therefore shortish session but as I told him, "I got mine."

I went back on Ashley-Madison on a whim this lunch hour because when you first sign up there is an option for a woman seeking a woman (or a man seeking a man for that matter) I hadn't selected that so I set up a shiny new profile and was amazed that in fact many of those ads are couples seeking a girl. Hmm something to think about but I can;t have hubby browsing there!

Meanwhile, I talked to Gabe a few moments ago by IM. He didn't mention his frantic emails of yesterday and I didn't bring it up. He was trying to commit me to a specific time for our next meet. I felt a little pressured and rebelled played dumb at the idea he was trying to close me. Salesmen. Always selling something.Come to think of it Mark is in sales too. Hmmm. So anyway I put Gabe off. He needs to cool off a bit I think. He doesn't have any real details about me, so I guess I don;t have to worry about him showing up at work or worse home, but still he is giving a needy vibe and that isn't attractive.

So I emailed Mark. He seems able to get his head around the idea that cheaters can't expect fidelity. I asked him how he would feel as a stand in for my husband if it comes to that with Jen. I explained his duties would be onerous and would necessitate him fucking another woman whilst I watch/help/participate but that I'd make the burden worth his while.

I told him it was unlikely though as Jen has permission to fuck my husband but a stand-in may be stretching her morals a bit.

I briefly considered sending a message to Brian who I appreciate waiting in the drawer obediently. But that seems a bit much. Like I said: my dance card is a bit full.

~update~

Mark fired right back saying he is "up" to the task. He asked why in the hell I didn't just tell her my handsome husband's name is Mark. I sent back explaining our heart to heart without going into her personal details...

hmmm perhaps Mark and June should seek out a couple....Ok this is getting complicated.

Partner in Crime?

Talked to 'Jen' today for quite a while. Got some things out on the table.

I had already admitted to her that hubby doesn't know I contacted them and might never know. That realistically it would be difficult to mention it to him after the fact and go through with a meeting if I had already spent time with them as a couple.

She admitted that although this had sort of evolved from an idea of her husbands when they couldn't find a single girl to join them, she loved the idea of some "alone time" with a couple herself. We talked about it in terms of cuckolding although I din;t use that term.

It seems that her husband is OK with her going with a couple, but its one of those close his eyes and not think about it things. He doesn't want to hear about it except as it pertains to the girl-girl stuff. I pointed out he could have serious regrets about it if he truly isn't into her being with the couple as a couple.

I ended up talking to him myself. I had told Jen to give him some privacy because I didn't want him to tell me in her presence what he thinks she or I want to hear. He admitted it made him nervous, but he said he was totally OK with her reciprocating on 'our end'. Bear in mind 'our end' is just me, actually. I pursued the thought pretty hard with him. Asking "Do you just want to see the two of us together and set a limit on what happens when Jen visits?"

He was pretty emphatic that although he is nervous he thinks it is exciting that she is as excited about the visit. She gave me the impression that she had kept to herself the excitement she felt about her freedom to be with both haves of the couple... Either she had been more explicit than she thinks or he more perceptive.

So point blank I said, "The deal I have with my husband is ANYTHING you do with me, he gets to do with Jen."

"Understood."

I went on to explain that depending on how things go, how we all feel, I intended to make any and everything available. "You realize that will likely mean I am watching my husband fucking Jen senseless?"

He got kind of quiet but As I probed further I realized he was kind of excited about it. It helped that I described in graphic terms what he could expect of me and to picture Jen would be doing the same things later.

When he gave the phone back to Jen we just chatted innocuously I somehow was having trouble going back and forth between them. Made me wonder how I would handle the two of them together. I ended up casually mentioning to Jen to call me when he goes out. I had for the most part talked to them from my car, occaisionally havinjg to watch what I say as I went in and stood in line for my lunch and did a coupld of errands.

I was picking up some things in an office supply store and it was pretty empty. I had that privacy in public illusion you get in public at the time. This is not when I was discussing anything graphic, but an odd half smile from a woman I ran into several aisles later made me replay it in my head wondering what i had said.

Its hard to think straight when in the throes of whatever it is I am in the throes of, so I better watch it.

So tonight Jen called me back after her hubby went out for a while. We really talked then. I was tempted just to give her this blog to bring her up to speed, but that is a Rubicon I don't think I should cross with anyone. Once you know people you know read your blog I am sure it changes how you write and what you say.

I did give her the synopsis of my recent activities. She was shocked that I have two paramours at the moment. asked a lot about how I met them and so on. She almost seemed to be taking notes. I felt a little slutty when I laid it out to someone else in the cold light of day. She wanted details and in the telling I lost a little of my shyness in the euphoria of telling it and reliving it as I did.

Turns out she has had some extra-marital experience herself. She kinda told me to make me feel less guilty as she said. Turns out she had me by a couple as she admitted to having had five separate flings in her I think nine year marriage. She explained that only one of them was an on=going thing but she broke that off when it got 'too intense'. The others, 'just happened'.

We talked about that and it seems she is open to cheating but has to feel like she hadn't sought it out. As I pointed out the end result is the same and she gets better quality if she influences the events...she seemed pretty open to that idea. She said she couldn't bring herself to hit on someone. She had had a lot of questions about Ashley-Madison and we basically left it that she was going to sneak onto there and 'have a look.' Not sure how I feel about being the corrupter of semi-innocent housewives. She actually is by the way, a housewife. Stays home, watches the kids. Doesn't do PTA. Does bake cookies. Like that.

We talked about how to handle me not having a willing hubby on my end as advertised. I was dangling the bait of Mark out there, but she didn't catch on or wasn't interested, not sure. She giggled that we should just go shopping and eat ice-cream and tell her hubby she got rode hard. I suggested maybe we just have some girl-girl time alone. She was enthusiastic about that idea. She pointed out it would probably be different to be alone together than to feel like we were performing for her hubby (Or my semi-imaginary one). We flirted with the idea of a pre-date date, but worried we would somehow give it away that we weren't surprised enough by each other.

I told her about Diana and how there is some tension there, but as co-workers its awkward and I don;t trust her not to say something, because she kinda speaks before she thinks sometimes. Not a good co-conspirator. I mentioned going to the bar with Diana at my husbands urging and she thought his being OK with that was curious. She said hers would totally go for it because as far as he was concerned she was reeling in a girl for a three-way.

We decided to tell her husband that mine is getting cold feet but is still somewhat open to the idea. That way there is no pressure to set a date that I may or may not have an alibi for.

When I logged in to write this I had several increasingly urgent messages from Gabe. He seemed miffed that I wasn't online to check in this morning. I kinda didn't like his tone. I didn't fire back as I considered as I do have fun with him. One of the messages said something about "You're probably tied up on a hot date?"

Not that it is any of his business. I have hinted with both Mark and Gabe that I have other interests in a way to let them know I am not interested in a formal arrangement. I mean really I am cheating!!..must I be faithful to a paramour?? I have been fairly explicit with Brian of course I took the analogy of his being a dildo in my drawer of sex-toys almost to saying almpst that way. Brian the dildo seemed to be a little more gentlemanly about despite his youth and inexperience than Gabe.

Damn! I just realized I didn't even mention Brian in my confessional with Jen. I'll have to go back to booth and say a few "Hail Jen's" or something. Weird I left him out.

I'm getting carpal tunell syndrome.

Not from typing from fingering myself. In bed, in the shower, in my car on the way to get groceries....

I read where women suffering from hysteria in the 19??'s went to the doctor who either had an anti-hysteria electrical vibrator of used digital manipulation (as in with his phalanges, not pixels.) to treat them.

I am feeling more insatiable rather than less from all the activity as of late. Even some of the best sex hubby and I have had in a while just makes me crave more. Seriously.

I had this whole fantasy in my head of calling up my love nest agent and having another chapter to tease hubby with. I almost made up a chapter for him in advance figuring I could act it out later...why would that seem wrong? The WHOLE THING is wrong!...


I am not actually suffering..I mean I find I am getting off easily, but still I feel kind of depraved and not in a sexy way. Well a litttle nymphomaniacally sexy, but just a smidge.

I know that weekends are usually for actual work for him..considered Marcus but he has family obligations on weekends...Brian would be available but if his girlfriend is working on the weekend to support his lazy ass, I'm gonna feel guilty....

Arrghhh...

So I went to the old tried and true and read through the inbox at Ashley-Madison. Mostly lame, but a couple of possibles....felt REALLY slutty saving a couple for thinking about later. 10 minutes was later. Answered one. Didn't hear back...

Gonna go jump the husband.

An affair vs. a hook-up.

I deliberately chose an older sounding term and a more youthful one. The first I think of in semi-romantic terms. The classic love triangle. An 'Affair of the Heart' is more or less what I think the full term would be, but probably in French. Affaire de coeur Oi? I think of an affair as something that no matter how benignly it started takes on a life of its own and involves emotions and alienation of somebody's affection. If he's French he would definitely be a paramour.

A hook-up implies that whatever the motivation it was intended to be and resulted in a fling. It might involve being swept off one's feet in a romantic gesture, but it is about sex. A casual fuck.

I ardently intended (and have so far accomplished) the latter while avoiding the former. Honestly the most emotionally involved I feel I am is with my un-named editor (cough, cough, ...jim who will likely edit this out) . I think that is because we have danced around the sexual attraction but made a friendship first.

The point I am making is that I am uninvolved because Brian is too young (and possibly unemployed) to be taken a serious threat to my marriage and Mark is too much of a man-slut. Mark the easy-going approach and low pressure sucked me in. His schedule, mine, and my reluctance to hit him up for another date after our extravagant first date kept the distance safe. I'd have to look at the dates but quite a while passed before round two.

I got the definite impression that after round two, I made a (slutty?) enough impression to peel back a couple of jaded layers. For whatever reason he is pursuing me a bit more aggressively than his laid back approach to getting laid. It was very hot for me too. Not an emotionally connective kind of feeling, but raw, animal lust satisfied. I'd definitely like to fuck him again. Hard.

What concerns me is that I think that having a regular arrangement, the so called FWB seems pretty dangerous to my marriage. I'd ironically feel a bit better if I had some inkling that he is preoccupied elsewhere. The thing is he isn't the kiss-and-tell type, so I can't really ask him "So, you fucked any good bimbos besides me lately?"

At least that's my rationalization for trolling Ashley-Madison today in the office on company time (from jim's  laptop..I'll get it back to you. really. maybe.). I look suspicious I am sure surfing away, but my backs to a wall and as long as I don;t visibly drool I should be good.

Guys are pretty attention starved so just logging on then off will probably yield me 25 or more messages since that puts me higher up on the 'active since' list. If I respond to any they usually reply within hours most have it set up for email notification I figure. On the rare occasion that I initiate the first message, even so much as a wink, and they are all over it. Still it takes a little while usually.

I was reading through some profiles which I had';t done since I lowered my height requirement. Not lowering my standards you understand, just wondering if short guys are kinkier. Anyway I decided to filter by who was online then. Figured they would either be a) unemployed, b) night-shift workers, c)very mobile or very flexible with their time, or d) so horny that they, like me, were risking jobs imagining a hot affair. Er Hook-up.

My next paramour was c) & d). What caught my eye was the check-a-box about "having a love nest." That sounded interesting. Hmm keeps an apartment just for fucking? Or what?

I opened a chat window and asked him more or less that. He hemmed and hawed and dodged the question. Basically he intimated that it was a little risky and he didn't want to go into it with less than a sure thing. He was more polite about it, suggesting coffee, get to know you, etc. Implying that he wasn't assuming I was going to flop onto a mattress just on his say so. Had a sense of humor which as the French would say is tre sexy.

I wasn't SPECIFICALLY looking for a short man but at an inch below me he does qualify as shortish if not really midget territory. Hmm a little person...now that would be hot, maybe adjust the height bar again.....

As we chatted Mark emailed. I had suggested it would be better/safer if he did that and told him I check that much at least from my phone. Didn't mention the bootleg laptop with the out of the building wireless cell company connection. That was interesting timing. I wondered for a bit if he had noticed me on A-M then realized I was on a different profile than the one I met Mark on...Paranoia about being caught cheating on my FWB was pretty hilarious.

So anyway, pic keys were exchanged, he wasn't hideous and apparently was not put off by my faceless pic. Funny how most guys are willing to accept you at cleavage value if face value isn't an option. It helps that I am a woman with a pulse.

I decided to be the aggressor. I mean why be coy. I am on a site for cheating wives, its not like he thinks I am a virgin, right? I asked him if his love nest had plans for Thursday between 11:00am and 12:00 and was it located convenient to..(I gave him the cross-streets, and no you may not have them. not even the town.)

He said let me see what I have.

???? he really has that many women scheduled???? Wow. Apparently the short guy has some skills.

I said something like that to him he lol'd me (I normally hate that btw.) Explained he was picking out a love nest.

HUH??? HE had several? Maybe he just meant he was willing to spring for a room?

Like pulling teeth but kinda intriguing.

Finally he said he figured he should just explain. (please do.) He decided from my typing that I seemed trustworthy or at least had secretarial skills. I lol'd back, but I actually did laugh, Out loud. At my desk. At work. We don;t have occasion to do that often, so I got raised eyebrows all around.

Since I didn't give city, name, or actual occupation I don't think I am going to get him in any trouble here. He has access to properties whose owners are not there. He went on to explain that the vacant ones are pretty low-risk, we remove the key from  (under the mat? Plant? Light fixture? Doorframe)?, let ourselves in, 'accidentally' lock the door behind us so if some other potential person and their keeper shows up there is some warning.

Option two is riskier but more luxurious. Some are furnished, owners hopefully away, may have a sitter, may not. Ordinarily, Monte, I'd take the riskier curtain two, but as he pointed out we will be in nervous getting to know you mode and this might be a bit much for example for anyone with a heart condition or pregnant. Neither of us are pregnant. He didn't say how his heart is.

He will find something handy and shoot me an address. I will confirm I am on the way or cancel Thursday. Hmm seems like this has some possibilities at least on the logistics end. Plus there's that whole cop-light at the end of lovers lane feel to it. Awesome.

I closed that deal and moved on to the pending assignation with Marcus. We both agreed session two showed an increasingly warm trendline. I decided I could flat out ask him about his bimbo du-jour. (I don;t know French for week or month.) I added that I am not fishing for comparisons, just curious about his sex-life from a voyeur's standpoint.

"Oh?" he replyed.."That's interesting. Sorry to report I haven't a business trip scheduled, best I can offer is drinks with the top producers and a couple of Doctors at a 'Gentleman's' Club. You wanna watch me get a lap-dance?"

Actually that did sound kinda fun. But "DOCTORS???" that seems sketchy.

"Oh it totally is, which is why they will be buying their own drinks and their own well you know whatever..these guys are youngish and golf buddies of one of my salesmen. I am not positive he keeps that professional, but I am positive he knows I see a strip club receipt in his expense report, he is so fired. I on the other hand am the boss, and I pay cash for such so I am above such requirements."

Anyway, I didn't invite myself along for the debauchery, but that sounded interesting. Oddly reassuring.

Disasterous Double Dating...

I don't remember what the title of this post was when I originally wrote it but I remember it being wicked clever and using alliteration, or onomatopoeia or something.

I knew that there were SO many things likely to go wrong with my speed dating fantasy that there is no way I would try it, even if I had a stable of very dependable discrete lovers/professional actors and a script writer and choreographer. SO there was no way I would meet one stranger much less many anyplace that my husband was near. (Unless of course it really was a random pick-up in front of my husband...maybe I should wear shorter skirts and wink a lot?)

SO...being one to obsess..I thought about modified versions...I ran it by "The Guys". Actually had a "Date" with 6 of them to come to a particular crowded, loud place that I know of, but have never been and no one I know goes. I say I had a date, because since all but one were married/in a relationship/Or likely lived in their mom's basement....They may have to be a no show...and that doesn't count the actual being stood up potential.

As it turned out three definitely showed, talked to two, ran out of there like a scalded cat before I had a chance to actually meet #3, and 4th claimed he was there but either was shy, clueless, or lying.

My "Signal" was supposed to my rather cute pair of red strappy heels. I figured it would be a way to either discretely notice who is looking for me or flush out the foot fetishists! (what girl couldn't use a foot massage?...J/K)

I had pictures of the guys faces. Some eagerly given, some more shyly..

First problem was there wasn't a set order they were supposed to approach..A couple of the guys that would have been on the guest list were dis-invited because they independently and persistently suggested the easy solution to the speed date logistics was a gang bang.(Not that there's anything wrong with that in fantasy / theory... Just not in a crowded bar methinks)

I don't want to bother giving these guys memorable names, because nothing happened and if something later develops with one of the guys I'll just mention then that he was one of the guys...

Take that back...one guy needs a name..and he won;t be back..lets just call him Jerk.

He was actually the second one I talked to, and the reason I abruptly left.

Everyone was supposed to get there between 6:30 and 7:00 during the "Happy Hour" and I was supposed to make a grand entrance at 7:00 to my adoring fans.

I was nervous and wanted to sneak an early look so I got there at just after 6 and was scanning the room when I locked eyes with a guy clearly looking at me..Yup..someone else with the same idea.

He smiled, shrugged, and looked down at my strappy shoes and back up.

He pointed at his wrist (where he like nearly everyone these days I just realized) wasn't wearing a watch. Its like saying dialing the phone...) He made a little come here then waggled his hand like I don't no more or less? Rather than re-invent sign language I got the idea, he wanted to know if it was OK he was early...I went over to him. He offered to buy me a drink, I said better not, yet.

He seemed nice, we talked mostly about how odd this whole situation was and I admitted that I was getting cold feet because I hadn't "dated" in years and several at once was a little overwhelming. I admitted to him that specifically 6 had invites...

He said he was the only one there so far. That agreed with my assessment, but I was curious how he knew that since he wouldn't have seen the pictures.

"Simple" I've been watching where guys are looking when girls come in. No one looks like they are definitely expecting anyone and huge racks are getting most of the attention.

I Laughed..I kind of liked this one...

I told him to hold down the fort I was going to go out and come in on schedule.

I actually walked from my car..(deliberately parked a little out of the way, but accessible for a get-away which turned out to be prescient )...twice, I got to the entrance early so I pretended I forgot something..-V8 smack to the head-..and came in the second time right at 7:00.

Jerk was acting as the doorman practically. Totally a good thing that hubby was no where around..(tax seminar)

He grabbed me by the elbow and practically dragged me to a booth where he had me corralled...

"What am I getting you to drink?" he asserted...ACTUALLY snapping his fingers at a waitress. She did come over nice waitress smile with I thought a hint of sympathy for what was probably my deer in the headlights look.

I ordered a cola...

He tried to get the waitress to add rum..I emphatically said no...

"So you want to get out of here?" he said like it was the most natural thing in the world. Apparently Mr. Take Charge works for him..considering the title of the blog, it wasn't working on this girl..I was already picturing him bent over and spanked and not in a good way.

Meanwhile guy number three was practically cued up in line a little ways away. Milling about nervously..

Jerk, oblivious as he is even noticed. "Yeah like he has a shot!" he smirked.

REALLY irritated me that Jerk was right..number three might have potential in another place but he was so obviously out of his element it was a little painful to watch..

Early Bird was scoring points for discretion with his wan smile clear across the room and without being obvious about it not making eye contact. Even approached a couple of girls chattering drunkenly and made them laugh a bit. I didn't sense it was "look at me I'm a player." Just killing time pleasantly.

I have no idea what Jerk talked about...it didn't seem to matter that I gave him a blank look every time it appeared he had asked a question. He answered his questions to me for me.

I couldn't think of a single way to extricate myself, other than flat out ditching him.

So I did. The whole bathroom dodge must've been something he has gotten used to because when I said I had to go visit it, and slid the WHOLE way around the U shaped booth to get away, I think he knew. His eyes hardened a little. Then he tried a little swaggering "you'll be back." grin. I wasn't.

Thank goodness for crowds and large people.

On the way home I used my phone to access AM and send him a lame message about I thought I saw someone I knew and had to duck out...I sent a note to early bird thanking him for being gentlemanly. He acknowledged said it was nice to meet you and didn'tt pursue..I wasn't actually brushing him off but think he thought that. I didn't have the energy to address Mr. Nervous and he apparently didn't have the courage to ask me what happened so I let that lie.

Number four picked entirely the wrong tone. His excoriating me for being a No-Show was just irritating. I hadn't seen him..(He wasn't Mr. Nervous) and I was pretty sure I was there, since I had been there and had seen myself.

I figure he was late or oblivious. Or maybe the interminable time spent with The Jerk wasn't nearly as long as it seemed.

Suddenly the suggested choreographed Gang-bang from fellows 7 and 8 didn't seem so awkward. Pass.

WAY too ambitious.

hmm as I worked on labels for this post I realized I DID give them names..I don't think you'll see two out of three of them again.

Pushing it....

OMG

I am breaking every rule on Don't get caught tonight...

First I should never never ner log on to AM from home.

I did, and "Subway Boy" was on. I expanded with him my parkinglot fantasy..

I told him I am not at all sure I can go through with it. He smirked that he's sure I am ready.

He's young, dumb (in many ways) not hot, but the idea is...he's 6'ish probably a little heavier than the 195 he claims. His wife is HOT...dumbass.

Yeah he actually sent me a picture..then several...On the one hand that is exactly the same sort of shit that made me irritated at my hubby. On the other hand he isn;t my hubby. Part of me wants to turn him in, part of me likes the idea that thi 25 year old wants to fuck me when he has a hot, willing wife at home. sick really.

First he sent pic of her in sunglasses dressed outside. Then later he sent annonymous pic of his, er well member, between her breasts. Nice breasts. Dumbass.

him sending me a picure of her fulll length, laying down, shot kind of low, her face farther away from the camera her pussy up close and very personal....

We actually talked about what if I helped him seduce her into a threeway...in some ways he and she are like hubby and I...lots of fantasy talk...no one expects it to go through...

Anyway that wasn't the most dangerous of getting caught...that would be after we switched to IM, and then I said prove it, when he announced he was stroking himself...he turned on cam and was BAREASS NAKED in his living room it looks like..says his wife was in bedrooom watching of all things, DESPARATE HOUSEWIVES!

Not to be outdone...I kept expecting him to ask me to turn on my cam, but when I had announced early on in IM that "I don't cam" he apparently believed the lie.

Completely wantonly without even being asked I turned on mine but not before unbuttoning my blouse, and folding the cups of my bra under creating a push-up and together shelf bra sort of thing...I turned my cam on (to see how it looked I told myself) then adjusted it to see my expression, and found myself fixing my make-up...I knew where this was going.

Putting on a thick coat of bright read fuck-me lips put me over the edge of reason and I invited him to see my cam...

At LEAST I maintained enough dignity not to point my cam down to see the cause of the O face that he got to see in all its splendid glory...yes, a 44 year old housewife, tits hanfging out, skirt around her waiste, panties around an ankle frigging herself off.

There was an actual noticeable wet spot on the chair in the office downstairs...

It was nervewracking but exciting to listen for the creak of the 2nd from the top stair or stirrings from upstairs.

As I hinted, yes Ive cammed before...but I ALWAYS aim lower than my face if I show anything at all, I ALWAYS wait till hubby is either out of the house or fast asleep, and I ALWAYS creep into bed to avoid waking him....

This time he got a little benefit out of it...I came into bed, yanked off his pajama pants and shorts and went after him...I was even sort of honest about it...

"What got into you?'

"OH, I was just looking at something wickedlyu pornographic online."

And risky behavior number three I'm back downstairs writing this another huge no no from the home 'puter.

So, I also went back online to see if he was still on...he wasn't at first then he was..I mentioned hubby got the benefit the horniness he induced in me...he was glad for me, said tried to get wifey interested but no-go. I felt guilty sort of and had these sneak out of the house and blow him in the drivway fantasies that I wisely kept to myself.

I kind of have a date. Sort of. Dumbass gave me his cell phone number. He thinks he is very clever. If it's on at the subway, I'm to send a text saying, Hey Bob, (insert he time) tee time at the golf course. He thinks that if his wife looks she won't wonder about his covering explaination that it was a wrong number text. (He doesnt golf and his name isnt BOB)

He also doesnt think I will realize that would give him my cell number. Jim (my pimp now) says get a throw-away for those sort of things...I'd accidently bring it home or something. I think I should find a cell phone left out somewhere and borrow it. Or better shock him with my voice from a payphone..(DO they still have payphones...last time I needed one with a lost cell charger I couldnt find one...hmmm)

Taking Chances...

One of the thing Jim warned me about was that my hubby has been spying on me online..When Jim answered the ad for someone to seduce me at work, hubby cheerfully told him he knew that I would be "up for it" because for one we talked about me being with another man in bed. (True, although mostly tales of old flames, with the occaisional sprinkle of future fantasy thrown in. The other reason he gave was that he knew I talked dirty to guys online. Also true, but we haven't figured out how much he knows. So, I have laid low.

Thats why I update this blog and check in with Jim (now my pimp) from Starbucks on this old forgotten laptop I keep in my desk at work.

Last night though, I was H-O-R-N-Y and was online in old familiar places trolling for men to play the slut with. It wasn;t something I did a lot of but was a guilty pleasure. My first time "cybering" online was actually from of all things a cribbage game I was playing online where you can talk in a chat window with the person yu are playing with.

Older guy...slyly seductive....we were half into it before I realized "We" were playing. Anyway, last night I was online hoping "John" as I am calling himwas on. He had mentioned that he uses his "crackberry" at worrk but is careful to delete everything and stay away from risky places at home lest his wife get suspicious.

I didn't actually even cyber, but I responded to quite a few Ashley Madison profiles and fooled around on a site I like to go to with forums and stories. Weird think about AM (at least for me) was the surprisingly kinky hot vibe I was feeling at being 'the other woman'. In so called 'Real Life' its always the married guys that are closest to directly hitting on me. Its kind of safer, they can always say, hey J/K! I used to get annoyed. Now for some reason, probably because I'm thinking of cheating myself that adultury in and of itself seems hot. I just thought a married guy would be 'safer' both as in he probably isn't making the rounds to as many skanks and because he has something to lose to.

I found myself getting aroused when one of the pics a guy sent showed this big four-post bed kind of in the background. I found myself wanting to fuck him specifically in his marital bed...or mine...Hmmm , getting too kinky.

I deleted everything, dumped cache, cookies, history and everything else I could think of...I was thinking later how suspicious that looks. I need to be more careful