My husband is a cuckold...

I was reading through posts for typos and not really reading for content you know...

It started to feel like work, and was wondering why I write this stuff down.

The only person I hear from about what I write is Jim and he's already heard details before I write them here. In fact a lot of this blog is cut and paste and clean-up sentances from emails back and forth from him.

He helped me put sitemeter on to show wht he has been telling me about how most people that do read don;t comment either because they don't want what they read to trace back to their everyday life blogs, or maybe they don't think their reaction adds much. I do enjoy reading comments on other blogs and can see Jim's point that it is sort of a community and it takes time to get to know people and make stopping by a part of your day..I didn't start it for that so its fine, but I do find that I, myself, do have a little circuit I travel caching up on favorite blogs...


I wanted to add the little box about who I read, then made it too complicated...

You see I read different blogs depending on the mood I am, horny wise, how I'm feeling about hubby etc etc..

I was thinking there are what I think of as cheating wife (well or husband!) blogs. (Jim says Infidelity blogs would sound more elegant...really??? elegant,,,thats a bit of a stretch).

Other one's are what I think of as cuckold blogs...that to me is where the guy knows about it...and of those there are two subtypes..(can you tell I like biology..been too long to remeber phylumm specie...) anyway....


There are I think happy cuckolds, they seem to get off on being married to a slut..(I think that is what my hubby's blog would be like if he had one and well, if he knew)

There are the not unhappy, but like made small by the cuckolding..(well some of them are small!!! giggle) where they cant satisfy and the are made to be embarrased etc etc...(these guys obviously like to blush...i sort of get that for them, but I tend to like these from the woman's point of view...)

Then there are "hotwife" blogs and "swinger blogs" these seem like the girl is sort of well friendly and the dude is cool with it. Kind of more kinky than pervy..hard to describe..



you see my point its hard to know which blog goes in which category...

Oh and new one for me is sissy blogs..this came up when Jim pointed me to some because of me following through o the whole get hubby in the panties project. I thought trannys..(not sure if thats polite...no offense...eek) were gay guys, and like hookers? For straight guys all seemd complicated to me...interesting kind of..

then through the unhappy cuckolds, I read about crossdressing as a humiliation tool...interesting that they seemd mostly straight or sort of bi, but "MAKE ME! (please)"

That interest me..

anyway..im going to try to put peopel where they belong..if I link your blog and you dont like the label let me know, I can change it drop it or whatever!

Wait Damnit. I wrote the title then went in a whol 'nother direction...

I was thinking wait my hubby isnt really a cuckold, maybe my blog should have like cheater or slut or whatever instead of cuck in the title..

Then I realized...above and beyond the sexual things I've done with guys online over the years..(and yes I think that cheating if you have to hide it its cheating...hmm wait I don;t HAVE to hide it he'd get off on it, but since I do, and its all for me, its cheating....) where was I?

oh above that and my fantasies and my little gentle d=sort of humiliation things I mess with hubby sexually, As soon as I pit that boys cock in my mouth in his car, hubby was cuckolded by him..and yes (I DID HAVE SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH THAT BOY) No cigars were harmed though in the act thereof.

I kind of want to hint about cuckolding or somehow give him the greenlight for HIM to hint like he used to about sharing me.

But on the other hand, him not knowing is actually the traditional way that a cuckold was viewed I read somewhere...

And him not knowing is kinky hot...especially not knowing the very thing that would get him off to kow..

So I am fucking over the guy I'm with, my husband by depriving him of the sexual fix of knowing, and well all of you by letting you read about it...

If I could be queen for the day, if he could suddenly know all (like read this blog...NEVER GOING TO DO THAT) and have to admit to me that it turned him on, then maybe watch me act it out with someone, maybe he is tied....shudder....

Hmmm underwear is kind off topic in a way...

I got a little caught up in the whole panty-waist (Do people still say that?) cuckold/wimp fantasy thing.

On the one hand it was pretty hot to be able to hold that kind of influence, it wasn't accurate to say he groveled or got off on the humiliation or whatever like in tales I read about guys that want to be second fiddle so to speak.

I was pretty into the idea, even plotting ways I could c-a-s-u-ally snap a phot of him in panties for the blog...ultimate turning the tables on his little "my wife could be a slut if you approach her right.." thing.

But that isn't so much my original premise.

He wants (sincerely) for me to fuck other people. I am warming up to the idea (to say the least!) He like my firend says wants a pimp/whore arrangement. My friend wants to see me in a cuckold/hotwife arrangement...(unrealistic - but oddly appealing). I think what I want is a cheating wife/ unaware hubby arrangement.

I could obviously do that just by being careful. But as I thought about ways that would make it "OK" like what if he hinted it would be hot if I had a lover. (which he more or less has even before the ad) In theory, I could see even telling him I did, and make it sound like a joke.

The more I thought about it the more I I think I just want to be a hedonist.

Whore???

I have been bouncing fantasy ideas off oh hubby's some what bewildered pysche altely.

(He actually asked what's gotten into me lately...I replied probably hormones, just enjoy it!)

We were classifying my early slutty history that he thinks is quite slutty that I at the time though quite conservative...He always points to the two-girl blow job as proof that I was the ultimate minx.

SO he says to me, what didn't you do because you didn;t have an opportunity?

I thought a long time I must admit to come up with..."Well, no one ever offered me money for it.."

He was puzzled then it dawned on him, "like you mean you never were a prostitute?" a few beats..."Would you have wanted to?"

I pointed out to him I said "OFFERED" not "ACCEPTED".

"So would you have wanted someone to offer?"

I think I actually blushed thinking about it.

"Yeah I guess so...it would have been interesting to have seen how they work..." not realizing at first that I had taken it a step further than his question...

He was visibly more rigid at the thought...

back to Jim's assessment that hubby wants to be my pimp.

Anyway, I am NOT going to follow through but I decided to place a craigslist ad...

HAPPY HOUSEWIFE...

Looking to meet generou$ traveler who has fantasies of despoiling housewives. Can meet you at your hotel. Will be presentable at least on the outside! Need a couple of days lead time, so book your fantasy now!

MJ
I lied about the housewife part sonce I have an actual job, but I remeber reading an article on one of those high end call girl busts about some of the girls being bored housewives...

So far no takers.

Not sure I should be miffed about that.

Hoagie for Lunch...

I skipped the whole secret code thing, and ignored his cell phone. I emailed him Monday for a lunch "date" (erp??!) yesterday.

I set some ground rules. He waits for me in the parking lot, I will find him. If I don;t show I don't show. Wear a blue polo shirt. Not because I told hubby thats what he was wearing, rather the other way around...after he was bareass naked in out cam chat that day he put one on, I wanted to be sure I didn't proposition a random stranger out of nervousness.) Iexplained to him that he gets to break me in to being a slut and I wasn't sure how slutty I was going to feel. I more or less promised him a blowjob. He was happy with whatever he said...

So.....

It's kind of hotter now thinking about how wrong it was than the actual blowjob.

I was too nervous to actually have him go to husband's parkinglot, and for that matter anywhere crowded...I told him to drive and we'd look for a spot...

At some point I reached into his lap and with a lot of fiddling (while we drove!) I got it out. I had him turn into a residential neighborhood. The weather was fairly nice it was sometime between 11 and 12 and I forgot that there are walking paths nearby in that neighborhood and after we parked some people did walk by...that was not scary hot, just sort of embarrassing..like I had "SLUT" written on my forehead...we just actedlike we were talking, but I couldnt imagine any reason two adults at lunchtime would park on a residential street to 'talk'

In between walkers I stroked his cock in his lap...he said he liked the start and stop..~shrug~

I had to get back to work, and I wanted to "go through with it" more than I wanted to do it, so I had him cruise the neighborhood and we found a parkinglot at a park that was sort of adjacent to a school, but far enough from the school to be kind of private..

One thing that was sort of hot was when he said I am not sure if I would totally recognize you if we met in a grocery store or theater line...

I said..."What about now?" as I unbuttoned my shirt and pulled my boobsout of the cups.

"Well those I recognize!" He grinned and began fondling in a pretty inept manner, but the action of it flooded me with feelings and memmories...;groping with boys in high school, even reminded me back to he and I camming, and I almost reached under my skirt to masturbate..but I was so nervous someone would come.

After what felt to me like stalling, I took a deep breath and said, "Ok I'm stalling.."

He started to say that's ok or something but was quiet as I brought my head into his lap..

Not very much room with the steering wheel, I said...lean it back...he snapped it back and the seat slid back plenty and he was clearly ready to be impaled on my mouth (Or is it the other way around?)

He was pretty excited so my worries that he'd last for ever went away...once he teased "Someone's coming!" I think to give himself a breather so he could enjoy it longer...I threatend to stop if he tried that again but I was sort of flattered and went back to work.

I was actually prolonging it anyway, when his balls would tighten I'd pull off a little and look at him and tickle them with my fingetips a little...finally I decided to finish him off and he finished EXACTLY when I anticipated, proving that all cocks work about the same way...at least for me.

Hmmm writing it its sounds very hot, but something was not fantasy perfect about it at the time.

I am now officially a slutty wife though I think..well at least a cheating one...

I read someone's blog about kissing her husband with cum on her lips. That seemd a HOT idea and something I totally cannot pull off with a straight face...yet.

Just slipped them on...

So I left the office all abuzz with how as predicted it went...

There were several versions of talking into actually putting them on suggested.

My favorite that I had intended to go with was to grab a catalog I had seen on top of the trash from the post office called U.S.Male where they had what I think of as Banana Hammocks mostly..mesh ones, different cuts, styles...anyway I was going to say I was looking it over got me hot wanted to see him in something less structured than the tighty whities he usually wears. He knows I prefer to see the buldge than say boxers, and it seemed plausible... Except that I had chosen clearly a girly pair as far as sheer and no structure at all to speak of.

My friend recommended the direct approach referencing a long ago time when in a fit of fantasy-talk fueld kink he had willingly put on not just a pair of satin panties over his hairy legs but even let me hook all the little eylets up the back of the matching bustier...it was a tight squeeze and we sometimes laugh about it, but not in a kinky sexy way.

When I got home I actually washed the pair from the office out in the sink and hung them over the rod. They were dry pretty fast I'm sure. I am not sure why they needed to be clean with the dirty task I had in mind for them but logic doesn't prevail always.

When he got home, he was looking expectant...(read horny) but oddly didn't seem to be quite initiating. So I did...

I crooked my finger then walked into the bedroom. When he passed me while I waited in the doorway, I shut it and grabbed his crotch and said "I think we have some unfinished business..."

"Uhm yeah, what was that all about?" he started...

This time with him standing pulling down his pants went a little smoother...I knew better than to laugh when he waddled a bit with his pants and shorts trapping his ankles...

Cock not all the way pointed skyward but sticking straight out. I've always though guys should never walk around naked with a hard-on...looks silly to say the least... little bit of motion and it swung to and fro.

I literally led him around by his cock. Men. I had a pretty firm hold on it and penguin walked him towards the bed, then pivoted him and pushed him onto the bed. Lite comedy as one of the shoelaces got stuck...

Actually had to loosen the knot with my teeth...I hoped that looked sexy from his angle..pants off at last, sox too, then shorts tossed aside.

Oops! panties! I said hold that thought and went to the bathroom returning with the pair..."So, where were we?" as I drug the panties delicately back and forth against the bottom side (well in this position the top side).

He was very still and shivvered a little bit at the sensation...

I grabbed his cock firmly in a handful of cloth and gave a couple of tugs, then stopped...backed up to the end of the bed where his feet were,

"You are a very lucky man.." I announced.

"yeah" he agreed.

"I mean you are veery lucky tonight, because I am feeling insatiably kinky.."

I had a whole explaination primed to go, and thought why bother, he's nude from the waist down, horny, and

Did I ever tell you about Subway Boy?

...So began a tale I told my husband.

I am driven with my whole cheating wife desire but held back by 19 years of monogamy.

I decided I needed him to "give me permission" even if it's unknowingly...

"No," puzzled look.

I had tried to "sound natural" but this isn;t how I usually start a storyt..he usually asks something and I respond.

I started in anyway...

"I met this guy for lunch it was sort of a blind date...we met outside subway...he made some crude reference to his foot-long "hoagie" and I took the bait asking him 'Oh is it something i'll be able to get my mouth around?'"

"When was this?" my husband asked...

"Go with it Dumbass!" I retorted..."I'm pretty sure you've heard all of my slutty accomplishments twice by now..I WAS MAKING ONE UP!"

"Oh, SOrry he said...go on...PLEASE.".."Details" he says..."Lots of details"

"OK," I said..."he was wearing cargo pants and a blue polo shirt...He was driving a kind of boring metallic Mitsibiti family type car"

"Well, maybe not those sort of details.." My husband interupted..

"You mean you want to hear how the soft spongey red head of his cock felt in my mouth as I closed my mouth around it feeling his hard shaft inside the tip of it?"

"Yeah.." he said.

"OK It felt spongey yet hard inside...warm too."

"HEY!" he complained....his cock I was stroking through his shorts was not complaining.

"You really should let me tell these things my way."

"Yes, dear" he said.

I went on, losing interest in the telling except as I realized I was describing possible future events.

I explained I was supposed to meet the guy for lunch but that he was obviously horny trying to look down my shirt and that although I thought the guy was sort of a pig, I wanted cock more than lunch so I told him "let's skip lunch." The guy didn;t even have a place in mind to go for privacy so I told him to pull around the back of an office building and after a little making out where I had my shirt unbuttoned and my tits hanging out of my bra that ws folded under...(sound familiar?)

I said he played with my tits a little and I had him lean his seat back...I told him to lose his pants which he did right in broad daylight, and I blew him. The end.

Hubby complained, so I said, well easier to show you. And I did. Cleaning out his pipes and sort of my conscience. Kind of like buying an indulgence, Dont know if I'll use it...

Pushing it....

OMG

I am breaking every rule on Don't get caught tonight...

First I should never never ner log on to AM from home.

I did, and "Subway Boy" was on. I expanded with him my parkinglot fantasy..

I told him I am not at all sure I can go through with it. He smirked that he's sure I am ready.

He's young, dumb (in many ways) not hot, but the idea is...he's 6'ish probably a little heavier than the 195 he claims. His wife is HOT...dumbass.

Yeah he actually sent me a picture..then several...On the one hand that is exactly the same sort of shit that made me irritated at my hubby. On the other hand he isn;t my hubby. Part of me wants to turn him in, part of me likes the idea that thi 25 year old wants to fuck me when he has a hot, willing wife at home. sick really.

First he sent pic of her in sunglasses dressed outside. Then later he sent annonymous pic of his, er well member, between her breasts. Nice breasts. Dumbass.

him sending me a picure of her fulll length, laying down, shot kind of low, her face farther away from the camera her pussy up close and very personal....

We actually talked about what if I helped him seduce her into a threeway...in some ways he and she are like hubby and I...lots of fantasy talk...no one expects it to go through...

Anyway that wasn't the most dangerous of getting caught...that would be after we switched to IM, and then I said prove it, when he announced he was stroking himself...he turned on cam and was BAREASS NAKED in his living room it looks like..says his wife was in bedrooom watching of all things, DESPARATE HOUSEWIVES!

Not to be outdone...I kept expecting him to ask me to turn on my cam, but when I had announced early on in IM that "I don't cam" he apparently believed the lie.

Completely wantonly without even being asked I turned on mine but not before unbuttoning my blouse, and folding the cups of my bra under creating a push-up and together shelf bra sort of thing...I turned my cam on (to see how it looked I told myself) then adjusted it to see my expression, and found myself fixing my make-up...I knew where this was going.

Putting on a thick coat of bright read fuck-me lips put me over the edge of reason and I invited him to see my cam...

At LEAST I maintained enough dignity not to point my cam down to see the cause of the O face that he got to see in all its splendid glory...yes, a 44 year old housewife, tits hanfging out, skirt around her waiste, panties around an ankle frigging herself off.

There was an actual noticeable wet spot on the chair in the office downstairs...

It was nervewracking but exciting to listen for the creak of the 2nd from the top stair or stirrings from upstairs.

As I hinted, yes Ive cammed before...but I ALWAYS aim lower than my face if I show anything at all, I ALWAYS wait till hubby is either out of the house or fast asleep, and I ALWAYS creep into bed to avoid waking him....

This time he got a little benefit out of it...I came into bed, yanked off his pajama pants and shorts and went after him...I was even sort of honest about it...

"What got into you?'

"OH, I was just looking at something wickedlyu pornographic online."

And risky behavior number three I'm back downstairs writing this another huge no no from the home 'puter.

So, I also went back online to see if he was still on...he wasn't at first then he was..I mentioned hubby got the benefit the horniness he induced in me...he was glad for me, said tried to get wifey interested but no-go. I felt guilty sort of and had these sneak out of the house and blow him in the drivway fantasies that I wisely kept to myself.

I kind of have a date. Sort of. Dumbass gave me his cell phone number. He thinks he is very clever. If it's on at the subway, I'm to send a text saying, Hey Bob, (insert he time) tee time at the golf course. He thinks that if his wife looks she won't wonder about his covering explaination that it was a wrong number text. (He doesnt golf and his name isnt BOB)

He also doesnt think I will realize that would give him my cell number. Jim (my pimp now) says get a throw-away for those sort of things...I'd accidently bring it home or something. I think I should find a cell phone left out somewhere and borrow it. Or better shock him with my voice from a payphone..(DO they still have payphones...last time I needed one with a lost cell charger I couldnt find one...hmmm)

Whats the most sexually adventurous thing you have done lately?

For me of course it was placing the ad in the first place.

The question above is what I have been working into private messages to people that approach me on AM.

I am still talking/teasing/plotting with "John". He worries me a bit. Because I'm obsessing a bit. Not his fault of course. I don't know that there is much distinction but I went on AM to find someone to fuck not to have an affair..like there's a difference.

ANYway..I keep asking the above question looking for something so hot that I can get over my fear of actually cheating f9or the first time.

Yes that implys a NEXT time and so on...

I want to get my slut on so to speak. I even have a name for my slutty persona now. I've been going by MJ when they ask what to call me. Its actually my shorting of my name but they take it as initials. MJ is in my mind the kind of girl that can go down on a guy in the parkinglot of her husband's office building then breeze in and give him a big kiss in front of prudence.

(That so far is the winner in the above question sweepstakes.) Not that the guy had that whole thing in mind. He just mentioned he met a girl for lunch and she ended up takiong him out to her car in the parkinglot and blowing him in broad daylight.

I have it all mapped out in my head. He actually works about 3 miles from my husband...The parkinglot of the subway is only about a mile from my husbands office...he has eaten there from time to time..

In my mind I'd have the guy take me to subway...I get wet thinking of the risk of someone seeing me eating there with a strange guy. I have my excuse already ready..."When he asked to sit there there weren't any other tables...."

I'd tell him "I'm ready to go out to the parkinglot...." His eyebrows would raise,...wolfish grin.."

I'd act nervous....tell him too busy parkinglot...lets find an office building...direct him to hubby's and park within view of hubby's window...theres a good spot that is under a tree....far enough away that that he couldn't possibly recognize me...close enough he might be able to see that a couple is fooling around....

oh yes I like this fantasy....

Taking Chances...

One of the thing Jim warned me about was that my hubby has been spying on me online..When Jim answered the ad for someone to seduce me at work, hubby cheerfully told him he knew that I would be "up for it" because for one we talked about me being with another man in bed. (True, although mostly tales of old flames, with the occaisional sprinkle of future fantasy thrown in. The other reason he gave was that he knew I talked dirty to guys online. Also true, but we haven't figured out how much he knows. So, I have laid low.

Thats why I update this blog and check in with Jim (now my pimp) from Starbucks on this old forgotten laptop I keep in my desk at work.

Last night though, I was H-O-R-N-Y and was online in old familiar places trolling for men to play the slut with. It wasn;t something I did a lot of but was a guilty pleasure. My first time "cybering" online was actually from of all things a cribbage game I was playing online where you can talk in a chat window with the person yu are playing with.

Older guy...slyly seductive....we were half into it before I realized "We" were playing. Anyway, last night I was online hoping "John" as I am calling himwas on. He had mentioned that he uses his "crackberry" at worrk but is careful to delete everything and stay away from risky places at home lest his wife get suspicious.

I didn't actually even cyber, but I responded to quite a few Ashley Madison profiles and fooled around on a site I like to go to with forums and stories. Weird think about AM (at least for me) was the surprisingly kinky hot vibe I was feeling at being 'the other woman'. In so called 'Real Life' its always the married guys that are closest to directly hitting on me. Its kind of safer, they can always say, hey J/K! I used to get annoyed. Now for some reason, probably because I'm thinking of cheating myself that adultury in and of itself seems hot. I just thought a married guy would be 'safer' both as in he probably isn't making the rounds to as many skanks and because he has something to lose to.

I found myself getting aroused when one of the pics a guy sent showed this big four-post bed kind of in the background. I found myself wanting to fuck him specifically in his marital bed...or mine...Hmmm , getting too kinky.

I deleted everything, dumped cache, cookies, history and everything else I could think of...I was thinking later how suspicious that looks. I need to be more careful