I hope I don't regret this....

Today at lunchtime I saw Diana across the building and invited her along. Looking back I'm sure I was intending at some level to 'fess up about some of my recent activities. I think what prompted it was the delicious excitement of talking to Jen about my adventures. I had a friend like Diana in my single days and she knew everything. I realized talking to Jen that dishing scandalous dirt after the fact used to be half the fun. Since I need to be discreet, it makes sense to keep my mouth shut.

What doesn't make sense is talking to Diana. She can be a bit of a ditz at times. I got to thinking about it though and realized that all of the "TMI" incidents I could think of involving her were about her own life. I don't think I've ever heard her passing on gossip. She seems like the kind of person you can trust with a secret, but she has to know its a secret or she might well spill it accidentally.

I realized as well that she hadn't really shared much more than the vaguest of hints about her current sex life and that just isn't like her. So I asked. "How's your sex life?"

She was pretty non-committal. again not like her. I said so. "There's reasons..." says she.

"Oooo a secret?"

She kind of grinned. I pursued it a bit and offered a little tease myself.

"Did I ever tell you about the guy I know with access to rentals?" I went on to tell her a little about Gabe making it sound very casual (which it is) and kinda past tense. (Which it may head towards.)

I told her about how he has access, yada yada, and sometimes takes a girlfriend to one of them for a little privacy. I gave enough detail about the place that without really consciously meaning to I put myself in the room.

"Is he married?" she asked point blank.

"Uh, yeah," I said then joked..."But so am I so that cancels it out!"

She laughed at that, and eased into her situation. She has a guy, he's married, she made me promise not to guess but when she mentioned that he is part of the reason that she doesn't flaunt her love life around the office, I read between the lines it is a co-worker. Interesting...not gonna speculate...not gonna speculate....not gonna...hmmmm

I asked whether he was the jeaulous type...she was puzzled at first and then said, "No, why would he be? He is spoken for anyway!" but then added that she just doesn;t want to rub his face in her other interests so it doesn't look like she is pressuring him or playing games. Makes sense actually.

I comiserated and explained I worry that "Condo guy" is getting a little possessive and maybe jeaulous.

"Of your husband?!"

I realized I had really stepped into it here...I acknowledged that I had more than one interest out there...

"Wow, I wouldn't have figured!"

Neither of us really gave any juicy details, but I enjoyed the exchange.

I emailed Jen but it was sort of that whole friendship maintenance sort of thing, 'Hi, How are you...' etc I worry that I am sending flaky signals or rejection signals, which I am not. Just not sure what to do with her, (them) and worry she might be a little fragile about appearances, as she has mentioned it a couple of times, like "I realize I won't be everyone's type." I have tried to reassure her. She has great skin, a cute curvy figure, and a killer smile. She worries about 15-20 lbs which she carries pretty well in the pictures I think.

Cooling off...

It seems feast of famine...

Mark is always a little harder to pin down schedule wise, and for some reason I am not assertive with him, and he doesn;t push...he has asked me more about Jen but nothing much has happened there.

Jen and I email, but after the initial giddy flush of excitement we seem to be waiting forthe other to make some sort of move. I'm sure I'll have to be the one to initiate, but I just worry that the reality won't match the fantasy I have bulit up in my head..so kinda cooling off there..I'll do something eventually, but not sure what she wants/they want/Iwant, etc.

Gabe I am cooling off on purpose. He is starting to get under my skin. He sent a note this morning that said he'll be at "our place' in case I decide to drop by. Said he'll have a bottle of wine open..like I'm going to come back to work late AND drunk. I mean one or the other, am I right?

Meanwhile I am trolling online for something else. Like I have the time.

My dance card is pretty full...

I was pretty worked up last night with all the possibilities after talking to Jen. I had a vague idea of setting some groundwork to include hubby. It seems like a reasonable entry point and pretty non-threatening. I could either tell him the truth or parts thereof. Either he would be OK with a swap as it is, or if not, he sure isn;t going to object to another girl in our bed, is he?

I wasn't sure how to proceed so I started with a few verbal nibbles about Diana. I wondered aloud what she would be like if she were Bi. Hubby didn't have a lot to add to the speculation but had an agreeable grin throughout my musings. I wandered closer to the truth suggesting we look into where a plyable woman could be located that might be interested in a threesome. He was pretty mute on suggesting anything, though I know for a fact (obviously) he knows about Craigslist at the least. I suggested generically a personal ad or maybe a lesbian club. Both of us actually are truly ignorant of where such a club would be found. Decent size metropolitan area there has to be one.

It ended up being a pretty intense and therefore shortish session but as I told him, "I got mine."

I went back on Ashley-Madison on a whim this lunch hour because when you first sign up there is an option for a woman seeking a woman (or a man seeking a man for that matter) I hadn't selected that so I set up a shiny new profile and was amazed that in fact many of those ads are couples seeking a girl. Hmm something to think about but I can;t have hubby browsing there!

Meanwhile, I talked to Gabe a few moments ago by IM. He didn't mention his frantic emails of yesterday and I didn't bring it up. He was trying to commit me to a specific time for our next meet. I felt a little pressured and rebelled played dumb at the idea he was trying to close me. Salesmen. Always selling something.Come to think of it Mark is in sales too. Hmmm. So anyway I put Gabe off. He needs to cool off a bit I think. He doesn't have any real details about me, so I guess I don;t have to worry about him showing up at work or worse home, but still he is giving a needy vibe and that isn't attractive.

So I emailed Mark. He seems able to get his head around the idea that cheaters can't expect fidelity. I asked him how he would feel as a stand in for my husband if it comes to that with Jen. I explained his duties would be onerous and would necessitate him fucking another woman whilst I watch/help/participate but that I'd make the burden worth his while.

I told him it was unlikely though as Jen has permission to fuck my husband but a stand-in may be stretching her morals a bit.

I briefly considered sending a message to Brian who I appreciate waiting in the drawer obediently. But that seems a bit much. Like I said: my dance card is a bit full.

~update~

Mark fired right back saying he is "up" to the task. He asked why in the hell I didn't just tell her my handsome husband's name is Mark. I sent back explaining our heart to heart without going into her personal details...

hmmm perhaps Mark and June should seek out a couple....Ok this is getting complicated.

Dressing for Mark...

In front of Gabe...as I straightened myself out after our little tryst was pretty interesting.

The time with Gabe was nice, almost like a couple settling into a groove. Not a rut as of yet. Gabe doesn't seem particularly adventurous but on the other hand I haven't given him any indication of wanting anything particularly kinky.

He had expressed no specific fetish-y interest in underthings, given the choice he says he prefers nekkid, mostly. He admits though its fun to fuck about unwrapping at times.

So I had worn a pair of black panties with a bit of lace trim that actually was part of the set that went with the bra. I had gone sans stockings and had a garter belt in my bag under my other stuff including a skirt that tends not to wrinkle and that hits not too far above the knee.

I had brought my usual bath soap in a trial bottle so I didn't have any tell-tale hotel soapy smells later. I decided to use the shower in the apartment too. I carefully dried the glass on the shower and made sure I hadn't left anything in the drain. Hotel de trespassers even had fluffy towels and a shower cap.

I remembered Derek noticing the red shoes that time I forgot to switch back so I decided to put on my ultra-sheer black stockings for the return trip. This necessitated digging out the garterbelt. Gabe had already done the linen exchange and watched fascinated as I clipped on the stockings.

He said, "I didn't know anyone still uses those kind of stockings anymore....I have only seen them in movies!"

"Well aren't I the glamor queen." I smiled. "I've got plans tonight that suggest a more theatrical look."

"Interesting." Gabe says but wisely didn't pursue that.

The fact that in writing this up the sex wasn't really noteworthy doesn't mean it wasn't worth doing. I did enjoy it. Missionary again, but I kind of like it. Gabe has a way of looking expectantly at you seeming to glory in my orgasm, so that is actually quite nice.

It's also possible that in writing this up a day later, I am a bit dazzled with the kinky memory of Mark's darker approach to our little tryst. That's the next post.

Oh, and btw, naturally Derek noticed as expected..."Stockings!' he said with a grin. I told him "Yeah I have plans tonight and want to look nice." I motioned him over to the desk and pulled out the other skirt. "This one will show off a little more leg tonight." He approved.

Now that is just slutty!

My plans for tomorrow and I am not talking about just the skirt.

I was talking to Gabe about revisiting the apartment. He had offered to try another one either in the same building or another one. Apparently there are houses as well available furnished. That might be interesting. I told him I kinda liked 'our place'. So we started to set a time and it was to be tomorrow lunchtime. I then realized it was the morning of my date with Mark, and that seemed a bit much to fit in..(no pun intended.)

I was feeling pretty deliciously decadent so I agreed. He is going to have some lunch ready as well, as I don't have tome to eat, fuck, do laundry and make beds all in an hour lunch (hour and  half when I stretch it.)

Now if I can just add some chocolate to the mix, it'll be perfect.

The Details...

All the Dirty I mean Clean details...

First of all I hadn't noticed but there is a privacy latch thing like hotels have on the front door. So with that thrown it would give us ample time to straighten up. Plus Gabe is quite sure no one previews these. He just has to check availability and said the girl at the management company admitted they haven't had much call for them lately. He cleverly asked if they were getting a little dusty and found out the cleaning services gives them a touch-up when called out only or on Saturdays for the weekly service.

So.....

With confidence (sort of...) we left a trail of clothes up the stairs to the bed. I then chickened out and went back down buck naked and collected my clothes down to my shoes and arranged them on the chair in the corner upstairs.

Feeling my exit was planned we peeled back the bedspread to find really nice soft sheets, 4 fluffy pillows and a much more luxurious place to find myself on my back. He had gotten there early to turn up the air conditioning and it certainly worked if my erect nipples were any guide...

He found those quickly nuzzling, licking, and with a little encouragement, biting...harder...mmmm that was nice and writhing on a mattress is much better...

It was pretty basic fare, secully, missionary position. I was ready quickly but he spent some time 'down there' making sure. I moaned (with sincerity) appreciatively.

He isn't noticebly muscular, but apprently in shape as he had no problem holding himself in various positions as he sought to get that angle just right..and right it ws. He hd a good sense of timing and rythem it seemed bringing me close then backing off then faster, then backing off only slightly. Not teasing, just building...it was really pretty nice.

We I came I clenched up a bit worrying I might squirt. (I do, rarely, but still...borrowed sheets)

He laughed and pointed out that a stackable washer dryer is on premises for such accidents. Spare sheets too. As I was re-dressing myself he stripped the bed and expertly made it up with fresh sheets. Weird watching a naked man do that. He seemed unabashed in his nudity. Kinda hot in a way.

"So we don't get caught?'

"Nope, so its ready for next time!" He grinned.

He started the washer (has detergent and everything there!)

Said he'd stop by later and throw them in the dryer.

Tidy man, that.

Real-Time Blogging....

I'm sitting on "our" couch in "our" living room. I slipped out early leaving Derek to cover for me. He was eager to do so and didn't ask any questions. Gabe is smiling at  me as I type, he hasn't asked me who I am emailing. He is sitting on the coffee table, probably trying to peek up my dress...(j/k).

Last time I met Gabe at Starbucks someone mentioned appreciating the real time update so I thought I would do that here. So here I am. Gabe gave me "the grand tour". Apparently the same company has four units in this building. One is taken. Gabe picked this one because it is the least accessible. He explained that since the corporation pays, no one really "shops" for these as long as they are nice so its unlikely that anyone will come a'knocking. Still the possibility that someone might adds a little edge.

We went up to the loft already and bounced on the bed, briefly. I asked him if the place comes with wi-fi. It doesn't but he said you can probably get service. (Obviously I can.)

I have my feet up now in his lap, careful not to puncture a testicle with a stiletto heel. He is working the ankle strap...has it off.  One bare foot. Mmmm feeling around his lap, yep, definately horny! Two bare feet...

Hand reaching up my calve....I better go...

Gabe gets us an apartment.

Fully furnished, kitchen, bath, laundry unit, livingroom, loft bedroom with a view....$0 per week.

As long as we scramble into our clothes when we hear a key in the lock.

This is apparently what is know as a 'corporate rental'. It is leased with everything included right down to dishes and linens. He says it is real pricey by the week, but most corporations that need things like this lease them by the month or even six month and rotate their visiting executives in and out of them. Cheaper than putting them up in a hotel, and home-ier too.

The advantage for Gabe is these are run by a property-management company that lets him have a set of keys to show them, where he doesn't have to record each entry. Nice.

We were going to have a spur of the moment visit today, but he got a walk-in customer. He says that almost never happens but in this economy you take what you can get. So tommorow, maybe.

Mark has a couple of positions open (missionary and doggy, j/k!). One is an office manager one is for a girl-friday; filer, scheduler. We joked about me applying and having a little closed door sexual harassment of the interviewee. A little risky though so , well no.

Feeling a little more confident.

Had a security breach and had to once again start over. I should probably jettison the old posts, but I thought I would try something not in any way obviously named like the old blog and see how that goes.

I was blogging blithely along with only an occasional look over my shoulder, then saw something gaining on me and then evolved into paranoia. All OK now (I think.)

So, I have been hesitant to get onto Ashley-Madison since I have been in damage control. I have corresponded with both (now Mark) and (now Gabe). I have renamed a few posts, Changed one name so far as well as my own (again). I already was leaving out some details of intimate times between hubby and I to make it easier to laugh this off as either "not mine" or a work of "fiction". Reads that way anyway I think.

Mark (was named for his early arrival then his similar first name) has been offering up tantalizingly kinky suggestions for both locations and activities for our next meeting. Probably soon.

Gabe (never had a name, but referenced his ability to have a crash pad) is more likely next up on the rotation as he can easily accommodate a lunchtime date. We have talked about something furnished this time. With or without green, wall-to-wall shag carpeting!

Brian seemed an innocuous enough name and hasn't really figured into plans as of late. I do talk to him by IM sometimes. He is compliant and eager but not pushy. That's a good thing.

Stalking my next assignation.

I decided I like the word assignation. And not just because it has a little ass in it.

Got a note from (insert clever name for short dude with burglary skills). He gave me an address, 11:00am sharp and Penthouse! and a little smiley face :).

He said "There's no doorman, and the lobby is open daylight hours. Elevator should work" Should work? "To be honest.." (apparently anticipating my discomfiture) "...it's a bit of a dump, but clean. Just old." He went on to give me several options: meet him on the top floor, lobby, or someplace neutral?

All of the sudden this seemed a little risky. I have no idea who this guy is...which is half the point of A-M. If I knew him like Marcus, I'd say blindfold me in the lobby...but I opted for neutral. Starbucks. There's one on every corner. sometimes two. Oops! Did I just give away my location or is that true in your city/state/country/world? You notice there are a few less lately though and moving inside of grocery stores and like that?

And what the hell was that about Marcus intruding into my thoughts about this?? Didn't notice till I typed it. This was supposed to exorcise Marcus off the top of my libido. Hmm we will see.

I naturally decided I should grab my lunch today to go and stalk this building...It is in fact kind of a dump but in a charming sort of way. 7-8 stories maybe? Sandwiched among taller buildings it probably used to have a view.  No sign of any sort. Toyed with the idea of going in but decided against it. Part because I'd feel dumb if someone asked me anything, mostly though I want to be surprised. (In a good way I hope.)

I tried out the Starbucks..(where I am typing this.) Kinda fern-bar ish, actually kind of a good place for a getting to know you before fucking you sort of meeting. Public with the illusion of privacy...looks like it used to be a restaurant with booths and probably foxes and hounds on the wall. You can almost smell the seared steaks through the bright white fresh paint everywhere.

I get so many questions about this one and that one by email..(each seems to have a horse they are pulling for, maybe because he -whoever that is for them- reminds them of themselves?) Anyway I feel like my life is now officially a multi-character soap opera and I owe updates for all. I should have everyone get a twitter account and they can all tweet..Marge teased/fucked/sucked/ignored/hugged me today.

But thats all that I have in the fire at the moment.

Did a little post-kareoke analysis with Diana (new name for an old character when I realized I used her real one) Nothing too personal or revealing was discussed. Someone suggested jumping her bones, that hadn't really occurred to me, now I find myself wondering, Does she?

I withheld my stocking-clad foot from climbing up Derek's pant leg in a meeting the other day.  have been most professional that way. My thoughts, less proffessional. I think I like the idea of his interest much more than, well you know. Safer to think that way, too.

Brian has left IM's when I am offline and I have responded...nothing there, just him being open to whatever..I probed that with some interesting for instances and met zero resistance. Would I be more interested if he did object? Dunno. I did mention at some point a long time ago that I thought infidelity in someone's bed was an interesting kink. He reported cleaning up their apartment. I hope his girlfriend appreciates me training him.

An affair vs. a hook-up.

I deliberately chose an older sounding term and a more youthful one. The first I think of in semi-romantic terms. The classic love triangle. An 'Affair of the Heart' is more or less what I think the full term would be, but probably in French. Affaire de coeur Oi? I think of an affair as something that no matter how benignly it started takes on a life of its own and involves emotions and alienation of somebody's affection. If he's French he would definitely be a paramour.

A hook-up implies that whatever the motivation it was intended to be and resulted in a fling. It might involve being swept off one's feet in a romantic gesture, but it is about sex. A casual fuck.

I ardently intended (and have so far accomplished) the latter while avoiding the former. Honestly the most emotionally involved I feel I am is with my un-named editor (cough, cough, ...jim who will likely edit this out) . I think that is because we have danced around the sexual attraction but made a friendship first.

The point I am making is that I am uninvolved because Brian is too young (and possibly unemployed) to be taken a serious threat to my marriage and Mark is too much of a man-slut. Mark the easy-going approach and low pressure sucked me in. His schedule, mine, and my reluctance to hit him up for another date after our extravagant first date kept the distance safe. I'd have to look at the dates but quite a while passed before round two.

I got the definite impression that after round two, I made a (slutty?) enough impression to peel back a couple of jaded layers. For whatever reason he is pursuing me a bit more aggressively than his laid back approach to getting laid. It was very hot for me too. Not an emotionally connective kind of feeling, but raw, animal lust satisfied. I'd definitely like to fuck him again. Hard.

What concerns me is that I think that having a regular arrangement, the so called FWB seems pretty dangerous to my marriage. I'd ironically feel a bit better if I had some inkling that he is preoccupied elsewhere. The thing is he isn't the kiss-and-tell type, so I can't really ask him "So, you fucked any good bimbos besides me lately?"

At least that's my rationalization for trolling Ashley-Madison today in the office on company time (from jim's  laptop..I'll get it back to you. really. maybe.). I look suspicious I am sure surfing away, but my backs to a wall and as long as I don;t visibly drool I should be good.

Guys are pretty attention starved so just logging on then off will probably yield me 25 or more messages since that puts me higher up on the 'active since' list. If I respond to any they usually reply within hours most have it set up for email notification I figure. On the rare occasion that I initiate the first message, even so much as a wink, and they are all over it. Still it takes a little while usually.

I was reading through some profiles which I had';t done since I lowered my height requirement. Not lowering my standards you understand, just wondering if short guys are kinkier. Anyway I decided to filter by who was online then. Figured they would either be a) unemployed, b) night-shift workers, c)very mobile or very flexible with their time, or d) so horny that they, like me, were risking jobs imagining a hot affair. Er Hook-up.

My next paramour was c) & d). What caught my eye was the check-a-box about "having a love nest." That sounded interesting. Hmm keeps an apartment just for fucking? Or what?

I opened a chat window and asked him more or less that. He hemmed and hawed and dodged the question. Basically he intimated that it was a little risky and he didn't want to go into it with less than a sure thing. He was more polite about it, suggesting coffee, get to know you, etc. Implying that he wasn't assuming I was going to flop onto a mattress just on his say so. Had a sense of humor which as the French would say is tre sexy.

I wasn't SPECIFICALLY looking for a short man but at an inch below me he does qualify as shortish if not really midget territory. Hmm a little person...now that would be hot, maybe adjust the height bar again.....

As we chatted Mark emailed. I had suggested it would be better/safer if he did that and told him I check that much at least from my phone. Didn't mention the bootleg laptop with the out of the building wireless cell company connection. That was interesting timing. I wondered for a bit if he had noticed me on A-M then realized I was on a different profile than the one I met Mark on...Paranoia about being caught cheating on my FWB was pretty hilarious.

So anyway, pic keys were exchanged, he wasn't hideous and apparently was not put off by my faceless pic. Funny how most guys are willing to accept you at cleavage value if face value isn't an option. It helps that I am a woman with a pulse.

I decided to be the aggressor. I mean why be coy. I am on a site for cheating wives, its not like he thinks I am a virgin, right? I asked him if his love nest had plans for Thursday between 11:00am and 12:00 and was it located convenient to..(I gave him the cross-streets, and no you may not have them. not even the town.)

He said let me see what I have.

???? he really has that many women scheduled???? Wow. Apparently the short guy has some skills.

I said something like that to him he lol'd me (I normally hate that btw.) Explained he was picking out a love nest.

HUH??? HE had several? Maybe he just meant he was willing to spring for a room?

Like pulling teeth but kinda intriguing.

Finally he said he figured he should just explain. (please do.) He decided from my typing that I seemed trustworthy or at least had secretarial skills. I lol'd back, but I actually did laugh, Out loud. At my desk. At work. We don;t have occasion to do that often, so I got raised eyebrows all around.

Since I didn't give city, name, or actual occupation I don't think I am going to get him in any trouble here. He has access to properties whose owners are not there. He went on to explain that the vacant ones are pretty low-risk, we remove the key from  (under the mat? Plant? Light fixture? Doorframe)?, let ourselves in, 'accidentally' lock the door behind us so if some other potential person and their keeper shows up there is some warning.

Option two is riskier but more luxurious. Some are furnished, owners hopefully away, may have a sitter, may not. Ordinarily, Monte, I'd take the riskier curtain two, but as he pointed out we will be in nervous getting to know you mode and this might be a bit much for example for anyone with a heart condition or pregnant. Neither of us are pregnant. He didn't say how his heart is.

He will find something handy and shoot me an address. I will confirm I am on the way or cancel Thursday. Hmm seems like this has some possibilities at least on the logistics end. Plus there's that whole cop-light at the end of lovers lane feel to it. Awesome.

I closed that deal and moved on to the pending assignation with Marcus. We both agreed session two showed an increasingly warm trendline. I decided I could flat out ask him about his bimbo du-jour. (I don;t know French for week or month.) I added that I am not fishing for comparisons, just curious about his sex-life from a voyeur's standpoint.

"Oh?" he replyed.."That's interesting. Sorry to report I haven't a business trip scheduled, best I can offer is drinks with the top producers and a couple of Doctors at a 'Gentleman's' Club. You wanna watch me get a lap-dance?"

Actually that did sound kinda fun. But "DOCTORS???" that seems sketchy.

"Oh it totally is, which is why they will be buying their own drinks and their own well you know whatever..these guys are youngish and golf buddies of one of my salesmen. I am not positive he keeps that professional, but I am positive he knows I see a strip club receipt in his expense report, he is so fired. I on the other hand am the boss, and I pay cash for such so I am above such requirements."

Anyway, I didn't invite myself along for the debauchery, but that sounded interesting. Oddly reassuring.