Sexy Texts.

I'm sure I look horrendous...didn't even go into the bathroom to freshen up after my flight as I don't want to see the dark circles under my eyes. I was up way to late having barely slept for two hours before I had to get up to catch my 7:00am flight. I slept on the plane where I didn't even mind that no doubt one or both of the single men I was sandwiched between probably had a look down my shirt at my bra-less tits. It would have distracted them from noticing the bags under my eyes.

I went through my phone to figure out what, exactly, I had told my husband about my whereabouts and activities of the day before.

me: Alone in the hotel bar waiting to be propositioned by some traveling salesman.
~basically true but the proposition had already been made (by me) and accepted

hub: Make sure you tell him it can be a tax deductible expense.
~Well the room was. Room service and mini bar is like, what 15% deductible?

me: Can't talk, I've got my lips around his cock.
~a little out of time sequence, I'd finished the fellatio but I could still taste him on my lips, so basically true.

hub: You are killing me, I can't stand up for fear of introducing 'Woody' to a room full of accountants and he just doesn't swing that way.
~thats a good one I may have to start calling it Woody.

(a while later after grabbing the phone off the nightstand to silence the messsage waiting beep and noticing the above.)

me: Oh I could use Woody right now. I am riding him cowgirl style, tits swinging inhis face grazing his lips and my ass is presented like a bitch in heat. Now would be a good time for DP.
~this was actually true in real time but I had to straighten up to type that.

hub: DP? who's that?

me: Double Penetration. If you bring an accountant friend He could triple stuff my mouth.
~I forget sometimes that his online perving (as far as I can tell) consists of NOT reading it for the articles.

There were a few more that he sent that went unanswered basically just fishing for more 'fantasy texts' as I called them later. I did talk to him last night and spun him a fine tale that it was implied but not implicitly stated that he was stroking to. Interestingly I didn't include any of the actual details from my date...compartmentalizing, I guess.

So after reviewing those I sent him a new one:

me: You should talk to the hotel about their security.

hub: About?

me: A sleepy, bedraggled looking woman (probably some whore worn out from a night of servicing clients) told them she was your wife. They not only gave out your room number but helpfully made her a key!

hub: How much do we have budgeted for whores on this trip?

me: This one is going to cost you $500.

We determined that he has already had his lunch break but they broke for 20 minutes in about an hour...so I sent:

me: Come on up I'll tell the whore to have your lunch ready.