If you obsess, they will come....

OK, I just got through posting that bit about Derek being off-limits since he works for me...

I was obviously thinking about him, since I just mentioned him in my lunchtime post about his apparent noticing of my slightly kinkier wardrobe as of late, but he hasn't remarked upon it. Up til now.

Now it wasn't like he just up and said something I did prompt him.

As I said, I had been deliberately teasing him with my heels today. I came back from lunch and kept it up. I leave at 11:00 and half my team leaves with me, other half at 11:30. They get 30 minutes versus my hour of luxury which always struck me as petty. I feel guilty so I don;t enforce the stragglers, some take advantage..on average I'd say most stroll in 10 minutes late. Some mumble excuses some take it for granted. Derek is one of those in early, stays a couple minute late kind of employees. Not brown-nosing I don't think and not me-specific since his reviews prior to me mention punctuality. He was at his desk working when I strolled in a couple minutes late myself. I knew he would be and hadn't had anything in mind (really!) but there he was.

I hopped on my desk which sort of faces his cubicle that he shares and said "Hi, hows it going?" He went on to explain a little about what it was that he was up to and had an idea or two about routing and such. A couple of times he faltered as his eyes were distracted by the arc of my swinging calve. (OK by this point I did have something in mind, but nothing well-formed.)

At some point he was staring off into space gathering a point and I swung my foot more or less in an arc through that thousand yard stare. He startled a bit, and actually blushed. I had him.

"What's on your mind Derek?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing," he mumbled, "I just..."

"Go ahead..Say it"

"Uh, I was just noticing that you wear pantyhose...." He rushed on...getting it all out in a string..."I don't mean anything by it it's just that my girlfriend mentioned the other day that hardly anyone she knows wears pantyhose anymore and definitely not in the summertime...I just was thinking it looked neat."

"Neat?" as in "Neat-o?" I was puzzled here..

He quickly rushed back in.."I mean like business like, polished I guess?"

"Well, thank you, Derek" I said. "It's nice to have the effort noticed."

"Really?" he said relieved..."I didn't want to, you know, hit a whole yellow light thing with that."

(We had the mandatory sexual/racial/orientation/gender sensitivity training earlier this year with a red yellow green light motif..)

"Hmmm....I didn't think you meant it at all that way....(of course I did!) and in general you would be right...like..."

About then a girl from a nearer cubicle filed back in...

I grabbed a stack of papers and beckoned Derek, who hopped up forgetting his earpiece til it yanked off his head..(that reminded me that the monitor room could have heard his side of the conversation and maybe even mine even though he was off the phone. Snoops! - but there is almost never anyone there around lunch time. I hope...)

He followed me and asked where we were going..I explained that the best place to have a private conversation in a crowded building without looking conspiratorial was on the run.

I explained that he is right that policy wise and sensible-wise commenting on anything a woman is wearing is something best left really neutral. "You look nice today" Vs. "You look hot". I pushed the envelope and said women in general are still women in the workplace and probably enjoy some attention as long as it is not a come-on.

"Oh, no...definitely not!"

"Definately not? Too Old?"

"No that's not it....I mean, I have a girlfriend and you are married and well..."

"It's OK, Derek only teasing a little."

We walked a little, hit an open staircase, headed up towards clerks-ville.

"If you have tacit or explicit permission you can be a bit more specific in compliments, but I as you supervisor would have to have been even more cautious...get it?"

"sure" but looked puzzled.

"To be explicit, you have my permission to stare at my legs if they please you, just don't be obvious lest your cubbie buddies tease you!"

"I can do that!" he grinned.

"Trust me, you need practice...periphials" (forty year old virgin reference..love that movie)."Back to work" I said pointing him towards the elevators to take him back down a flight.

"And, Derek..."

"Yes?"

"They aren't pantyhose." I turned and sashayed (really!) in the opposite direction. Kind of wish Jim were in I.T....thought about going through there to tease some nerds, but I have no reason to interrupt their dungeons and dragons games or whatever they do up there.

Black honest-to-god stockings and a garter belt tomorrow or my name isn't Slutty-Bossy-Lady.

(this took forever to type on my phone btw...and doing so while seeing Derek in MY peripherals made me want to embellish it into a whole "stay after work in the broom closet fantasy", but I held off - bravely)